creating a healthy lifestyle

one thing that i've really been trying to work on is creating a healthy lifestyle for myself. a friend of mine shared an article on facebook today called 30 things to stop doing to yourself that really spoke to me, so i had to share! you can read the full article here, but in the meantime, here are some of the high points that i really liked...

1. stop spending time with the wrong people. life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. if someone wants you in their life, they'll make room for you...the ones who stand beside you when you're at your worst are your true friends.

how many times have you had the "abused puppy syndrome?" you know, where you constantly seek out the companionship of someone no matter how horribly they treat you or take advantage of you. one thing that i've really found freeing as i've become an adult is realizing that i don't want to cultivate a friendship, or maintain a friendship, with someone who doesn't want to do the same with me.

8. stop berating yourself for old mistakes. we may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. we all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. but you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.

there are so many things about myself that i wish i wouldn't have done or said. guess what? you can't change it. realizing that and embracing it is so liberating. everything i've done, said, or endured in my life, has lead me to the place i'm in now. like my granny used to say..."you've gotta forgive it and move on. you can't live in the past." easier said than done sometimes, but something that must be done in order to achieve peace and happiness.

9. stop trying to buy happiness. many of the things we desire are expensive. but the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free--love, laughter and working on our passions.

oh materialism...how it's so easy to let you creep in and take over my life! as i've grown into adulthood, i've found that the times i've been the most anxious or stressed, is when i am comparing my life to that of my friends or family or random person on social media. yes, it would be nice to go shopping at chanel or travel to australia on a whim, but right now, my life isn't suited for that, and that's okay. what i have to realize, is that if it were, i would likely not have the most important thing to me, which is my husband, and that is something that i could never dream of sacrificing. besides, biggie said it best...the more money we come across, the more problems we see.

16. stop being jealous of others. jealousy is the art of counting someone else's blessings instead of your own. ask yourself this: "what's something i have that everyone wants?"

a great follow up to #9. how insulting it must be to god when i covet someone else's [fill in the blank with ANYTHING]. i'm learning to consciously name the things that i am grateful for in my life rather than focus on things i do not have. guess what? i probably don't need them anyway.

20. stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it anyway. just do what you know in your heart is right.

confidence is key. period.

21. stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. the time to take a deep breath is when you don't have time for it...sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.

my name is rachel, and i'm a workaholic. i kid, i kid, but seriously, i reeeeaaaaaaally have a hard time leaving work at work sometimes. it's so important to be present in the present. oftentimes, the mundane fleeting moments end up being the most important ones in your life. how terrible to miss one because you're consumed with what is going on at the office. i also have found that my greatest ideas and progress at work come after i've taken a break.

28. stop worrying so much. worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. one way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: "will this matter in one year's time? three years? five years?" if not, then it's not worth worrying about. 

THIS!!!!! i constantly have to remind myself of this. sometimes, you just have to remember that it the grand scheme of things, sometimes the matter at hand just doesn't matter.

xoxo- rachel

obsessed

so i've clearly taken quite the break from blogging over the last several months. i'm working on getting back on top of it, and to kick off my renewed dedication to blogging, i thought a jam was a great place to start.

lend me your ears and enjoy this lupe fiasco jam. it puts me in the best mood these days--and who doesn't love a little idie rock/hip hop mash up?? enjoy...

the perfect day

i was so excited to get my wedding pictures back from our photographer, shelley, a few weeks back. unfortunately, though, i have also been swaaaaaamped with work and haven't even had a chance to really look through them and/or post them here or on facebook. things at work haven't slowed down a single bit, but i did make time tonight to really look at them and i just had to share a couple of my favorites from before the ceremony...enjoy! :)

**disclaimer: i have sooo many more favorites, i just can't show them all because i'm using some for some gifts for friends and family. i'll post more soon! 

our "first look." lol.

this just cracks me up. christi, the girl with the disgusted look on her face,
is michael's sister and couldn't bear giving him a kiss. haha. 

"cheers" with our best friends.

he's stupid good-looking. i am waaaaay too lucky. ;)

with my sister.

best looking bridal party. ever.

our rings :)

my bouquet (which was perfect and rustic and gorgeous). the tie around it is my mimi's (my dad's mom) garter that she wore when she married my papa 65 years ago. such a sweet "something blue" for my big day. 

more to come, lovelies!

day 29: music that will change your life

Day 29, Wednesday: Five songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories. Use Grooveshark or YouTube to include them in the post

"music expresses that which can not be explained and can not remain silent." -victor hugo

1. dig by incubus

if i turn into another

dig me up from under what is covering

the better part of me

sing this song

remind me that we'll always have each other

when everything else is gone.

to me, one of the most beautiful things in life is to find someone who loves you despite your psychotic nonsense flaws. that's what love is. the ability to appreciate differences, flaws, and imperfections. knowing that michael loves me even when i've become the no-make-up-face-neurotic-emotional-monster, and knowing that it doesn't scare him off, makes me appreciate him and love him even more.

2. inaudible melodies by jack johnson

slow down, everyone,

you're moving too fast.

this was, not only, one of my dad's favorite songs and always will remind me of him, but it also just reminds me to relaaaaaaaax. as an event planner, i'm constantly looking to the future...the next week, the next event, the next deadline. sometimes you just have to chill. 

3. hey ya! by outkast

shake it like a polaroid picture

this song makes me think of back when i was in high school. it also just makes me happy and want to dance. let's be serious...sometimes you just need to shake it!

4. amarillo by morning by george strait

i ain't got a dime, but what i got is mine.

i ain't rich, but lord, i'm free.

amarillo by morning, amarillo's where i'll be.

this song makes me think of my granny and papa. they used to go out dancing all the time...they even taught me and my cousin, justin, how to waltz when i was probably no more than 9 years old. such a sweet memory. and you gotta love george!

5. shake it out by florence + the machine

i am done with my graceless heart

so tonight, i'm gonna cut it out and then restart.

cause i like to keep my issues drawn 

it's always darkest before the dawn...

...and it's hard to dance with the devil on your back

so shake him off.

this song reminds me to keep myself in a good mood. it's so easy to be grouchy/bitchy/negative...at least for me. i just love the picture this song paints for me. someone trying to dance around and be joyful, but they can't because the devil is weight down on their shoulders. i loooove this song, especially on days where my mood needs a bit of an adjustment! it also takes me back to the best. concert. ever. i love you florence!!

day 24: my worst traits

i know, i know, i know. i have sucked at blogging this week. we've had a lot going on--mikey's birthday, work, etc. just life in general. i'll do a catch-up post, i promise. :) for today, though, i get to tell you my three worst traits. this is actually really easy for me to admit...

1. i am stubborn. sooooooo stubborn! when i feel that i've been wronged, i expect an apology. no exceptions. you hurt me? guess what. you're now dead to me. it's really something i need to work on. remember the wise words my granny spoke to me about forgiveness and moving on, and not living in the past? yeah...it's a little easier said than done for me most of the time. i will say, though, that once i feel like appropriate amends have been made, i'm fine.

2. i am a control freak. i want things done a certain way. i want people to see my point of view (and more often than not, agree with me). i want things to go my way. at work, i want to be everywhere and do everything. sometimes i have issues delegating.

3. i'm a processer. when anything happens to me (or someone close to me), i have to talk it out...a lot. i call it processing. this isn't necessarily a bad thing, because it's how i deal with stuff, but it can cause me to be redundant and slightly annoying, i'm sure. i have to talk about every aspect of the situation; how i felt, how any other party felt, what was said, what was in the underlying body language, etc., etc., etc. i'm sure other people thing i'm just plain exhausting.

i could easily make this list 10 items long, but according to the challenge, i get to catch a break and stop at three. :) happy friday!

day 17: favorite picture

day 17: a favorite photo of yourself and why. 

today's challenge topic is super easy for me. ever since this photo was taken back in 2007, it's been my favorite. 

there's not really a way i can say why this is my favorite picture of myself without sounding totally vain and shallow, so let's just call a spade a spade here. lol. i think i just look drop dead sexy in this picture. come on! those boobs? that hair? WOWZA!

the night it was taken (before one of my sorority date parties), i felt like a super model! and isn't that the best feeling? like the stars have aligned and your hair, outfit, make up--everything--just feels and looks great? well this was one of those nights! i felt confident, sexy, sassy, and fun! it was wonderful and i'm so glad we snapped a picture. every woman should have a picture of herself where she just felt gorgeous. this is mine!

day 16: strength

today, on the challenge, i get to discuss something difficult about my "lot in life" and how i'm working to overcome it. i think one of the major aspects of the hand i've been dealt in life is being strong. is this a bad thing? absolutely not. can it be difficult? totally. 

i've had some curveballs thrown my way; all of which lead friends, family, etc., to tell me, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." they were all right. those hard times did make me stronger, but guess what. that doesn't mean that i feel any less shitty about what's going on.

when the going gets tough, the tough get going.

that's great, too, but it sucks to have to feel like you have to be tough all. the. time. 

there for a while, i literally felt like i couldn't catch a break--that my only purpose on this earth was to take emotional hits. my grandmother, who i was extremely close to, passed away very suddenly. not even three months later, i found out that my dad had stage 4 throat cancer (and he wasn't even a smoker!!!). the two years following were an emotional hurricane of cancer treatments, and statistics, and hoping, and praying, and surgeries, and more surgeries, and procedures, and traveling, and medications, and having dad get a little bit better, only to find out that something else was wrong. it was emotionally exhausting.

i felt a lot of pressure. pressure to keep the tough persona up. pressure to "stay strong for dad." pressure to keep my mind focused on school (because i was in my senior year of college and trying to graduate). pressure to not just totally give up. pressure to not totally disengage myself from the situation. pressure to not become totally numb. there's a lot of work that goes on emotionally when you feel like you have to be everything. 

i'm really not trying to whine. 

for me, the way i found best to "overcome" the feelings of pressure and having to be tough all the time was to simply let go a little bit. as a bit of a control freak, you have no idea how hard that is for me. i've learned that it's okay to get upset. it's okay to cry. it's okay to be a little depressed. expressing those emotions doesn't mean that you can't handle what's been given to you. it just means that you're human, and that's okay. if i'm stressed, or scared, or feeling a little less than perfect, i feel that. 100%. then, once i've taken time to process those feelings, i'm able to move on and be entirely more productive than if i would have tried to totally suppress those feelings and be "strong." 

the ability to be hit with a situation that shakes you to your core and makes you question life or death or anything else, then take those feelings, express them, and come out on the other side with a better understanding of life and yourself. that is strength.